My children were watching a program on PBS the other day. It was one of those educational children's shows like Clifford and the Berenstain Bears and Calliou that are designed to teach good moral values: tell the truth, love one another, respect differences... This particular episode was intended to teach children how hurtful insults can be.
I've seen many variants on this theme and they are uniformly and spectacularly ineffective. The plot is always the same: cool older kid (or bear or dog or woodchuck) uses insult or fake curse word, protagonist (and usually friend/sibling) overhear the cool new word and use it on a friend/sibling without fully realizing its power, friend/sibling is crushed, parents find out and lecture about not using bad words, protagonist feels bad for hurting friend/sibling, apologizes and learns never to use the word again. Really, who on earth thinks that's going to work?
So, there I sat with my kids, watching educational TV, when a cool older kid rode onto the screen on a skateboard and said, "Stupid!" I knew exactly where the plot was going: the heartbreak that was going to come when the word "stupid" was hurled at another character on the show, the parental shock and horror, the protagonist's remorse. And I knew where it was going to go in our household, the same place this particular lesson always goes:
"Stupid! Ha ha ha!"
"Yeah, stupid! Ha ha ha!"
"This show is stupid!"
"It is not stupid! You're stupid"
"I'm not stupid! You're stupid!"
"No, you're stupid, stupid."
"You're stupid!"
"You're stupid!"
"Stupid!"
"Stupid!"
Sigh! Now I know that some of you will blame television for being evil, but I don't believe it. I know my kids have gleaned a variety of equally awful behaviors from that other source of great evil and corruption for young minds: yep, books.
Of course, my husband reminded me that while children's book authors and the creators of educational television may not know what appeals to and motivates children, the makers of the comedy series Home Movies definitely do. As soon as I told him I was posting about this, he began quoting from "Don't Put Marbles in Your Nose," one of our very favorite bits. And lucky you! I found it on YouTube. This will teach you!
After you've watched it (and put a few marbles up your nose and hurt yourself laughing), I'd love to hear what moral messages have corrupted your own children -- or you!
Yeah, i must admit that as a kid that when i heard don't do something, it made it WAY more tempting. My friend went to Catholic school and the nuns told him what not to listen to, such as Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, etc. So as they said this, he wrote it all down as his shopping list of what to buy. Even Rudy Guiliani told New Yorkers to not go see this art show in Brooklyn, where most likely noone would go see anyways, and made it a hugely popular show. We all do that! And hell, i am writing this to you with a marble up my nose!
My big pet peeve is the way these shows/movies/books/teaching is trying to make the good/right/moral behavior FUN. It is just dishonest.
Sharing with your sibling isn't always fun, anymore then following the rules or persevering or eating only carrots. Why can't it be ok to have things you have to do in this life, if you don't like them or find them fun. When Cookie Monster started singing about the joy's of vegetable, I felt something close to despair.
Great post.
I love the new site!
Too funny! Love the video! I know it always made me want to do something more when I was told not to do it. Heck, I'm still that way! LOL!
I'm 48 years old and I still have issues with being told what NOT to do. It's still like, "Oh yeah? Just watch me."
One day, I will grow up. I have to believe this or else I am doomed.
So my son (4 yrs old) says, "Mom, I'm hungry." And I say, "Would you like an elephant or maybe just some grass with kangaroos?" And he starts to cry and says, "Stop teasing! Teasing is wrong!" I blame daycare.