Image credit: Photo by CowGummy on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons It started off innocently enough years ago. She would forward me the usual stories warning me that I should watch out for snakes in McDonald's ball pits or people out to steal my kidneys or serial killers who would lure me out of the [...]
Posts under ‘control’
Doesn’t Work Well with Others
Image credit: Photo by nickwheeleroz on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons A big red C. There it was, heartbreakingly plastered on the front of the report I had worked for weeks on. I had painstakingly drawn a wombat on the special mottled pastel paper, neatly stenciled the title ("All About Wombats"), and enclosed it, along [...]
What Are You Going to Do Now?
Image credit: Photo by Frank Peters on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons I shared in a meeting recently about my fear around my husband's business trips and how that fear is a reminder to me to connect with my Higher Power. After the meeting a newcomer asked me what I'm going to do now: I [...]
Learning to Climb
Image credit: Photo by weesen on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons Yesterday, I took my kids out to the park and watched my son, long and lanky, swing his way to the top of a climbing structure formed from a maze of ropes. Like many autistic individuals, mastering motor skills can be a challenge for [...]
It’s Not About Sex
Image credit: Photo by Leo Reynolds on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons With the story of South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford's week-long disappearance to visit his mistress in Argentina buzzing about, we're faced yet again with a barrage of images of a public figure tearfully apologizing for his infidelity, while his job hangs in jeopardy.* [...]
Finding God Together
Image credit: Photo by ashley.adcox on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons "Do you remember what you said to me when I first started talking about God?" Mark asked the other day, "You said, 'I am willing to try to work through this sex addiction crap, but if you ever become a Christian, I swear, I [...]
No Answers
Image credit: Detail of a photo by Carla216 on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons This week, when our family pet went missing and later turned up dead, I did an obsessive imitation of some of my favorite literary detectives; like Sherlock Holmes, I tried to piece together the smallest clues and like Hercule Poirot, I [...]
Opening Up
Image credit: Photo by casch52 on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons This week I plan to tell one of my best and oldest friends about my husband's addiction after nearly six years of silence around it. I've wanted to let her in to this part of my life, because keeping her out -- keeping anyone [...]
Struggling for Positive Control
Image credit: Photo by .m for matthijs on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons My COSA meetings are structured around a speaker who reads from recovery literature and then briefly shares. This week's reading from Pia Mellody's Facing Codependence was a passage on negative control versus positive control. She defines negative (unhealthy, codependent) control as trying [...]
