Image credit: Photo by Express Monorail on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons In the dream, I was driving on a highway laid out like silver thread between my home and the nearest big city. My husband was seated next to me, smiling, and I could feel the kids safely at home, laughing with their babysitter. [...]
Posts under ‘healing’
Starbucks
Image credit: Photo by brownpau on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons Just days before I discovered my husband Mark's sex addiction, we were shopping in Target, when we passed a young woman. "Hi, Mark!" she chimed, smiling brightly. Then she turned to her shopping companion, a man who was glowering at Mark, and said, "Jimmy, [...]
Killing Me Softly
Image credit: Photo by Estrella Esteve on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons "I can't hear this song without thinking of you," I said to Mark as The Cure's "Just Like Heaven" came on my music mix a few days ago. It reminded me of falling in love with him in college: how he made me [...]
Looking Back
Image credit: Art by jeloid on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons I started keeping a journal semi-regularly when I was in middle school. My very earliest journal entries are a thrilling roller coaster ride through the life of a suburban tween: from the heartbreaking lows of the cancellation of my favorite TV show to the [...]
What Are You Going to Do Now?
Image credit: Photo by Frank Peters on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons I shared in a meeting recently about my fear around my husband's business trips and how that fear is a reminder to me to connect with my Higher Power. After the meeting a newcomer asked me what I'm going to do now: I [...]
The Man in the Mirror
I roll my eyes as a cluster of neon clad girls buzz, "The way the sidewalk lights up as he walks is so cool! I love that song." Michael Jackson and that stupid Billie Jean video. Cool? Whatever. He's so overrated. I mean, if you wanted to talk about enduring cool, who could really compete [...]
Don’t Take My Kodachrome Away
Image credit: Photo by [xinita] is Oliver Twist! on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons When I found out about my husband's sexual addiction, it felt like my emotional landscape faded from bright vivid color to monochrome shades of black and grey. I had three primary emotional settings: fear, anger (shading into full on rage) and [...]
Finding God Together
Image credit: Photo by ashley.adcox on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons "Do you remember what you said to me when I first started talking about God?" Mark asked the other day, "You said, 'I am willing to try to work through this sex addiction crap, but if you ever become a Christian, I swear, I [...]
Recovery is Sexy
Image credit: Photo by Eternal ☼ Sunshine on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons It was raining the night I first kissed my husband. The wind was hissing and howling through the bare branches of the trees, rattling the last of the dead leaves still clinging to their posts. Before we kissed, we twined our hands [...]
In Which I Wish Addiction (and Recovery) on the World
Image credit: Photo by JustinLowery.com on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons This weekend, for the first time in my life, I had the opportunity to hear a sex addict from my husband's recovery group speaking about his experiences. I know my husband's story, about as intimately as anyone else can; in a way, it's my [...]
