Image credit: Photo by brownpau on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons Just days before I discovered my husband Mark's sex addiction, we were shopping in Target, when we passed a young woman. "Hi, Mark!" she chimed, smiling brightly. Then she turned to her shopping companion, a man who was glowering at Mark, and said, "Jimmy, [...]
Posts under ‘infidelity’
The Grocery Store Gamut
Image credit: Photo by blackbiscuits on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons One day, early in his recovery work around sex addiction, Mark and I were standing in line at the grocery store, when I commented on a headline on one of the news magazines. "I can't look," Mark said. "What?" "It's not good for me. [...]
Killing Me Softly
Image credit: Photo by Estrella Esteve on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons "I can't hear this song without thinking of you," I said to Mark as The Cure's "Just Like Heaven" came on my music mix a few days ago. It reminded me of falling in love with him in college: how he made me [...]
I Don’t Buy It
Image credit: Photo by lamazone on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons The Junky's Wife recently posted about an article that's been doing its wildfire dance through the Internet. It passed through my inbox several times as girlfriend after girlfriend blasted it out to everyone in their address books until I got the creepy feeling that [...]
Honesty Is the Best Policy
"It is confusing to be in relationships and not know where we stand... We have a right to be direct about how we define the relationship — what we want it to be. But relationships equal two people who have equal rights. The other person needs to be able to define the relationship to. We [...]
Cyberstalking Syndrome by Proxy
Image credit: Photo by Corie Howell on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons I have spent my share of time cyberstalking the women my husband has acted out with. (Hey, I'm codependent; I'm really, really good at focusing on people who aren't me.) And I'm not alone. Focusing on and obsessing about the activities of acting [...]
It’s Not About Sex
Image credit: Photo by Leo Reynolds on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons With the story of South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford's week-long disappearance to visit his mistress in Argentina buzzing about, we're faced yet again with a barrage of images of a public figure tearfully apologizing for his infidelity, while his job hangs in jeopardy.* [...]
Disclosure
Image credit: Photo by Duo de Hale on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons When I found out about my husband's sex addiction, I spent weeks ripping every last Who and Where and What and How Often out of him. While he was at work, I'd make lists of questions and then keep him up late [...]
Where the Wild Things Are Recovering Haikus
Next weekend is Mark's Sex Addicts Anonymous annual retreat. Every year I joke, "I could send prostitutes there and make a killing!" Every year he laughs and says "I'm off to sex camp." We kiss bye, smiling. Recovery and addiction may be no joke, but it helps to laugh.
Walking the Crooked Path of Dread
Way back a year and a half ago, I entered a contest to win a copy of the book Momma Zen by Karen Maezen Miller. I had never heard of the book, so I based my decision on the following factors: It was a free book. The title had both Momma and Zen in it, [...]
