Image credit: Photo by Jose Téllez on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons You know why I hate the word codependent? (And although I have taken on that label, I still truly do.) It has the word "dependent" right there in the word. Weak, wussy little "dependent." It practically whines at you: "I'm so helpless. I [...]
Posts under ‘language’
The Racial Issue
Image credit: Photo by GarySmith70 on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons "Mama, I'm half black, half white," Janie calls to me from where she's playing in the living room. I'd been wondering when this day would come, the day when my biracial daughter would finally notice race and start talking about herself in racial terms. [...]
The Hardest Words
Image credit: Photo by Bekah Stargazing on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons My son Austen, like many other autistic individuals, does not like (or understand the purpose of) many of society's little pleasantries. He balks at words like hello, goodbye, please, sorry and thank you; anything that can appear in a conversation as part of [...]
Defining Ourselves as Codependents in Recovery
Image credit: Photo by Éole on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons In a recent business meeting at my COSA group, we gathered to discuss a possible change in our meeting script. The script had been adapted from scripts from other meetings, including meetings for addicts, and contained a portion where we have a moment of [...]
No Excuses for Me
Image credit: Photo bykasiaeryn on FlickrLicensed under Creative Commons If there's a word in all the English language that I absolutely hate, it's the word "excuses." When I hear that word, I cringe and wave my hands in the air and make inarticulate sounds of dismay -- like "Uh ba ba ba!" -- to ward [...]
Defining Differences
Image credit: Photo by chinger7 on Flickr A little over a year ago, I read an article in the New York Times that focused on the difficulties faced by typically developing siblings of autistic children, which was of interest to me because I have two children: one autistic and one neurotypical. One issue the article [...]
How to Speak Codependent
Image credit: Photo byMFinChina on Flickr The Codependent language is one with which many of you are already familiar. While there are numerous variations and dialects, the lyrical nuances of Codependent itself are preferred by many in the Codependent tribe. Derived from the ancient Passive-Aggressive, it contains elements of Veiled Criticism, Judgmental Subtext, Implied Requests [...]
Dirty Words
Photo credit: Photo bychristopherdale on Flickr When I was younger, my best friend Vickie and I used to hide under the stairs in the basement of my house and whisper curse words to each other in an elementary school act of defiance. "Asshole," I would say, and giggle. "Shit," she would whisper back, covering her [...]
