Image credit: Photo by kandyjaxx on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons When my son Austen was two, my husband disclosed his addiction and spent a morning on the phone desperately looking for a marriage therapist willing to see us on a weekend. But once we had that appointment, having no family nearby, we had to [...]
Posts under ‘marriage’
The Geographic Cure
"The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you." despair.com Early in recovery, I struggled with the notion that the geographic cure -- trying to fix my life with a move to a new home, a new job or a new relationship -- is a fallacy. I know that I bring my [...]
Disclosure
Image credit: Photo by Duo de Hale on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons When I found out about my husband's sex addiction, I spent weeks ripping every last Who and Where and What and How Often out of him. While he was at work, I'd make lists of questions and then keep him up late [...]
Where the Wild Things Are Recovering Haikus
Next weekend is Mark's Sex Addicts Anonymous annual retreat. Every year I joke, "I could send prostitutes there and make a killing!" Every year he laughs and says "I'm off to sex camp." We kiss bye, smiling. Recovery and addiction may be no joke, but it helps to laugh.
False Talismans
Image credit: Photo by Alé on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons I took myself out to lunch today. Nothing fancy, just a fast food place. I was appropriately decked out for the occasion in my classy mom gear: a battered old college sweatshirt. The man waiting on me looked, I thought, older than I am. [...]
Safe from the Rain
Image credit: Photo by (((((i))))) (((((see))))) (((((you))))) on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons A few months ago, my husband and I sat in our car in an empty parking lot. We'd gotten the kids settled with a babysitter, although it had taken longer than usual, and had driven to a place we knew we could [...]
There’s Nothing Wrong with That
Image credit: Photo by Marty (S) on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons I went out to dinner a few weeks ago with some old friends who were curious about my recent 12 Step work, having had no experience with 12 Step or recovery work themselves. I told them that I was finding the exercise of [...]
Short E-mail Exchange, Long Time to Get Here
Image credit: Photo by funtik.cat on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons The message inside reads: "God is the answer." from Mary Jones to Mark Jones subject Invitation to connect on LinkedIn This seems to be for you but came to me... ---------- Forwarded message ---------- From: Sue Smith To: Mary Jones Subject: Invitation to connect [...]
Dream State
Image credit: Photo by Joe Thorn on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons When I have nightmares, my subconscious doesn't like to get imaginative. There are no weird surrealist scenes. There are no horror movie serial killers. There are no dank and mouldering castles. It likes to stick with what it knows: my children in danger [...]
This Is Not my Life
Image credit: Photo by mtraker on Flickr Licensed under Creative Commons Just before my son Austen was born, Mark and I bought a video camera, so that we could document each special moment of his new life. Of course, the milestones, like Austen, were quirky: giving his earliest smiles to a beloved bottle of hand [...]
